Mon, 26 Apr 2010 2:53p.m.
Newsflash: At time of publishing an earthquake measuring 6.9 on the richter scale has struck near Taiwan.
By James Murray
Let’s all give the internet a good kicking – it’s just a load of boobs and religious fanatics isn’t it?
If you’re not plotting to blow up your local skyscraper and complaining about others' freedom of expression, you’re getting sweaty palms while ogling a comely woman from downtown Dallas.
But today the internet kicked back and showed how boobs and religious fanaticism can co-exist in a semi-serious news story.
Let’s get the laughing about the word “boobs” out of the way now.
…
Good, now we can move on to the serious side of this story, which is a pretty straight-forward science-versus-religion debate.
In short, a Muslim cleric called Sedighi said this:
“Many women who do not dress modestly… lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society which, [consequently], increases earthquakes.”
And a US blogger called Jen McCreight has launched a Facebook campaign called Boobquake.
Scientists as unfortunate as Sesame Street’s Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker would not hold the view that exposed flesh directly correlates with seismic activity, even if we look at the cleric’s wider view that it is a general societal decline that is to blame for recent tragedies in places such as Haiti.
This particular cleric would beg to differ of course, but is not alone in his view that human morality has a causal link to natural disasters.
God himself became the world’s first Zionist after releasing a series of 10 plagues upon the people of Egypt because of their enslavement of the Israelites. The message was clear – enslave an Israelite and be rained upon by frogs.
AIDs is a modern day downpour of frogs and boils and has in one way or another been regarded as a punishment for the sinful behaviour of homosexuals by members of various religions. In the same sense I blame nose-pickers for the cold virus and sock-sharers for verucas.
Fundamental Christianity’s very own mad cleric Pat Robertson seems to believe that the Haiti quake was caused by a pact that Haitians made with the devil.
In an interview with ABC News he said:
"And you know, Kristi, something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it.
“They were under the heel of the French, uh, you know Napoleon the 3rd and whatever, and they got together and swore a pact to the Devil.
“They said, 'We will serve you if you'll get us free from the French.'
“True story.
“And so the Devil said, 'Okay, it's a deal.’
“And, uh, they kicked the French out, you know, with Haitians revolted and got themselves free.
“But ever since they have been cursed by, by one thing after another, desperately poor.
“That island of Hispaniola is one island. It’s cut down the middle. On the one side is Haiti on the other side is the Dominican Republican.
“Dominican Republic is, is prosperous, healthy, full of resorts, etcetera.
“Haiti is in desperate poverty.”
As an Englishman, I think the French are more to blame there than the devil. Oh, and tectonic plates.
In the aftermath of the devastating 2004 Boxing Day Tsunami the Westboro Baptist Church was quick to get to the heart of the matter and used the opportunity to take a swipe at Sweden.
Owners of the nicely titled godhatesfags.com (doesn’t God also dislike bad language?), the Baptists swiftly set up godhatessweden.com.
“Thank God for 5,000 dead Swedes,” declared the site. It urged church members to “pray for all 20,000 Swedes missing in the Tsunami’s wake to be declared dead”.
The rhetoric of church leader Fred Phelps is astonishing and makes the Muslim cleric Sedighi appear almost reasonable.
"The tsunami was an adumbration of the wrath of God, a harbinger of things to come: that Great Day of Judgment... those Asian countries weren’t the only ones affected by the tsunami. Do you realize that among the dead and missing are 3,500 Swedes and over 3,000 Americans? Sweden, who recently jailed a Gospel preacher for a month because he preached Bible verses and sentiments about the abomination that is the homosexual lifestyle from his own pulpit to his own congregation. America, who is awash in diseased fag feces & semen, and is an apostate land of the sodomite damned. And you wonder if this is the wrath of God?"
If I practised a religion I would despair at the views of pastors and clerics like Phelps and Sedighi - they really give worship a bad name.
People who should be advocating the merits of love and tolerance instead find themselves ducking criticism from atheists and agnostics based on the views of overly vocal extremists in their midst.
Boobquake may not conclusively prove that Earthquakes are not caused by tits, but if it gives people with moderate views on religion a springboard to say something remotely sensible then it will be a good thing.
Don’t let medieval madmen drown out the achievements of a liberal society. They want to build walls between those who believe and those who do not – let the tremors of Boobquake tear them down.