Fri, 21 Jan 2011 12:16p.m.
If you've ever wanted to see a man wearing aviators and a crash helmet bellowing 'Sweet Child O'Mine' from atop a unicycle, then Christchurch certainly has the event for you.
The 18th World Buskers Festival in Christchurch started on Thursday, January 20 with the first Stoneleigh Arts Centre Comedy Club - full of great performances but plagued by dreary weather and a drearier audience. Hopefully both pick up as the festival continues.
The Blackstreet Boys (terrible name) were the MCs, and kicked off with the obligatory well-crafted earthquake joke ("We got up at 6.30 this morning 'cause the building started rocking 'cause I was having sex!') then tried to instigate some kind of terrible manoeuvre where they yelled 'Christ!' and the crowd yelled 'Church.' It was not a success.
The first act was Mulletman, who is one of my favourite buskers. (Last year he was the Press Critics Choice winner, so evidently his luxuriously flowing mullet appeals to all). He started off by mucking about with a diablo (the thing with the sticks and the string and the hourglass), which he chucked high into the air, dropped, and said an unbuskerish word about. No one minded. He also rode "the tallest unicycle some people have ever seen," mullet swaying lushly in the breeze, and was worth seeing just for his impressions of national juggling styles from around the world. Mulletman's long-haired charm has not waned.
After a slightly less crap burst of compering, the improbably named Million Dollar Eyebrows came out! He got off to a bad start because for some reason I thought he was a French mime (eek! mime!) but then he turned out to be a Canadian contortionist and immensely likeable, and so harmony was restored. Most of his time slot was taken up with prepping reluctant volunteers, but the ridiculous final show (featuring a hastily recruited flower, monster, princess and fairy) was hilarious and worth all the faffing around before it. Add this to your list of Shows to Watch (but Never Volunteer For).
The first half finished with Jon Hicks, whose routine would best be described as 'speed performance painting.' An unusual but enjoyable show; very impressive.
Post-interval the Blackstreet Boys were back with a faintly topical Bieber reference, and then Jessica of Kalabazi - first time at the buskers' festival - came on and was charmingly fun, if a little despairing at the quality of the crowd. Jessica is a trick cyclist who is looking for love and holds her suitors to high standards; Jessica is very good on her yellow bicycle, even if a drunk chap in the crowd shouted out that he could see her bum. (She replied, "I can't see it! Enjoy!") I'd like to see her show again with a better audience.
Vinyl Burns was potentially fantastic (best banter of the night) but at a slight disadvantage because his was the second unicycle out, and Mulletman's had been taller. I know that size isn't everything, but when it comes to unicycles there's not a lot else to compare (tyre width? frame weight? coarseness of bicycle seat joke?) so he suffered a bit because of that. I'm going to write to the organisers and suggest a one-unicycle-per-night policy. He also suffered, I think, because it was cold and the crowd was restless because the hard benches were hurting their soft corporate bottoms. Next time they are going to bring a cushion.
However, the crowd forgot about their aching rumps as soon as the last act came on - Funny Bones were absolutely hilarious and the highlight of the evening. One woman giggled so loudly and constantly throughout that the performers showed her a yellow card as they leapt and bounced their way through a light-hearted and killingly funny show. I loved them. They had juggling (but in a good way), an extensive dance routine involving an audience volunteer (who was very handsome but that's beside the point) and lovely giant puppets which communicated entirely by kazoo. Clever, creative and playful, Funny Bones were my favourite act of the night. You should go and see them.