It infuriates me that no one ever talks about balancing fatherhood with a career. Why? Quite frankly, because most dads don't have to. It is taken for granted (as with the comment below) that the mother will somehow manage the kids, household and hold down a demanding job. Where is the husband and dad in all of this? A dad is just as capable of providing quality care to children and running a busy home. Surely in this day and age, more emphasis needs to be put on splitting household and child care equally between working parents instead of the mother being the one to shoulder the full responsibility.
I wonder how much of the problems we have in our society are due to stressed out mothers. The mother is the heart-beat in a home. If the mother is exhausted and stressed out, the marraige will be frail and the children will be stressed out too. I don't know how many times I have been rushing around like crazy in the morning trying to get the kids dressed, fed and in the car, trying to look presentable myself for work, and put such pressure on the kids, they end up in tears. You can't rush a toddler. Then I spend all my energy at work, come home, have to spend any last energy on cleaning the house, cooking, packing bags, tidying up. I can go for a week without having a meaningful discussion with my husband. I am amazed that our marraige has lasted so long. I wonder how many marraiges break up from this kind of stress, and how many kids grow up feeling stressed, because they were always rushed. I wonder what kind of quality of life this is. I wonder if our whole society is going to turn around one day, and say "I wonder how we could have been so cruel to our mothers and our children. It went against what our hearts were telling us to do, but we did it because we had to".It's not just the maternity leave that is the problem, it is a problem that an average man can no longer be the sole bread-winner of a home. Our salaries are just not enough. To people that say "you should have planned better", I ask, is it only the very rich that are allowed the privellage of having children in your life? Is it only the very rich that are allowed to not be alone when they die?
There are 4 issues: 1) If you can't afford to have children/be at home if you want you shouldn't have them. It's not up to the taxpayer to pay for your lack of planning. 2)If you do become pregnant & need/want to work then centres have you over a barrel....even if you chose to stay at home for the first 4 years then place your child into care under the 20 hours ECE for the last year re getting ready for school, many centres - especially in main cities, will charge the parents a fortune. E.g. some will charge excess of $100 per week as reckon the 20 hours is merely a subsidy and therefore, only works to reduce the fee they would normally charge. This is despite MOE stating that "ECE services can’t charge fees for the hours of 20 Hours ECE, but they can charge for your child’s other enrolled hours." 3) Re so-called quality. Your professor has nailed our current debate re fully qualified ECE teachers - especially where under 3's are concerned. Quality for our littlies is someone who takes an individual interest in your child. Such children would benefit from the "nana touch" as referred to by Fiona Hughes from Kidicorp. 4) Re professor Waldfogel' s view that over 3's would benefit from more formal structure - rubbish. There is no solid research to support this. Those of us in our 40s & beyond did not get this kind of childcare & in fact, were mostly at home with our parents/whanau until we turned 4 at which point we would go to Kindergarten for 3 hours 3 times per week - Kindergarten which was very basic compared to today's Te Whaariki nonsense. There is no proof that 3 & 4 year olds benefit from intensive ECE and in fact, there is still more research that shows it puts far too much pressure on the children. Teachers have their place but there is no evidence to show that they ensure better outcomes than a child who has been at home with Mum, Nana or a home-based childcare provider for their first 5 years. Childcare seems to be mostly about politics & money