By Daniel Rutledge
Production company The Asylum produce a very special brand of films. Yes, I mean that meaning of the word 'special'…
The latest Asylum film is Mega Python vs Gatoroid and it delivers what the fans want: an awful script, appalling acting and an eyeball defiling overload of terrible CGI.
The movie follows a group of pythons that are released into the alligator territory of the Florida Everglades. Some fool messes around with steroids and whaddya know, both species grow to gigantic proportions and battle each other. Lots of humans get eaten and lots of animated gif looking creatures get torn to pieces.
If you're into 1987 pop culture, you'll dig seeing one-hit-wonders Debbie Gibson & Tiffany in the lead roles fighting each other and taking on the special creatures. They certainly don't have a future in acting but they both bring an admirable amount of enthusiasm to this schlock.
The actress I enjoyed the most however was Kathryn Joosten. She constantly looked bewildered and had the demeanour of a Tim & Eric Awesome Show extra.
Kathryn Joosten in Mega Python vs Gateroid
The DVD has a making-of feature which I watched to see what director Mary Lambert said of her intentions with the film. Years ago she made slightly more respectable numbers like Pet Cemetary and an Urban Legends sequel, so surely she must be aware of the trash she’s making with this, right? Well, not really. “I think you’ll be surprised at the humour in the film,” she says at one point.
Another highlight in the making-of is Tiffany saying she is good at ‘imaginating’ things.
It might make me kind of a sadist, but I prefer my so-bad-it's-good movies to be unintentionally crap. When a movie tries to be great and fails on every level it can be incredible (Troll 2, Killing Spree etc). When a film tries to be awful and achieves that simple goal, it can be fun but it's not quite the same sort of magic.
But I don't want to be a killjoy, this does what it says on the tin. Fans of other Asylum films like Sharktopus and Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus will definitely enjoy Mega Python vs Gatoroid.
Of course if you’re wanting to see a movie of real quality, you should look elsewhere.
Mega Python vs Gatoroid played at Auckland’s Academy Cinema for free last night for a group of lucky fans. For those who missed out it is, inevitably, straight to DVD this week – watch the trailer.
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