Mon, 01 Mar 2010 5:08p.m.
As I watched Tiger Woods’ public apology on cbs.com [http://bit.ly/cEN6T8] I felt like I was peering through the keyhole at a student in the headmaster’s office, apologising for something he regretted being caught for more than doing.
“I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible behaviour I engaged in.”
At this point I would have stopped him and dished out a further detention for bad grammar. What he should have said was, either, “I am deeply sorry for the irresponsible behaviour I engaged in,” or, more simply, “I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible behaviour.”
What he actually said was technically redundant, which is no doubt how his wife felt when she became aware of his polyamorous tendencies. However, she need not have felt so bad had she been more versed in this “modern” version of polygamy.
Polyamorists argue that it is emotionally retarded – excuse the Henry-esque terminology – to have the capacity to be intimate with only one person at one time.
They would have coached Elin to replace jealousy with compersion, which is a “non-sexual state of empathetic happiness and joy experienced when an individual's romantic partner experiences happiness and joy through an outside source, including, but not limited to, another romantic interest. Sometimes called the opposite or flip side of jealousy.” (Wikipedia [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compersion]
Of course it’s doubtful that Tiger is a confirmed polyamorist. He’s just a dirty, playboy scoundrel. But his 13-minute, scripted and highly controlled media event would have left Dr Gary Taylor – George Matthew Edgar Professor of English, director of the History of Text Technologies programme at Florida State University and polyamory expert/activist – green with envy at the wasted opportunity to promote an enlightened, alternative lifestyle. (Hear Taylor talk to Radio NZ National’s Kim Hill here [http://bit.ly/98nxnx].)
Meanwhile, back in the principal’s office, teachers in Houston TX may face a severe ticking off and even expulsion (or maybe they should be just made redundant) for not teaching well enough. ABC News reported recently that “teachers whose students consistently fail to improve on standardised tests may be let go.” [http://bit.ly/9JY6M4].
If you read my previous blog entry, you may be unsurprised that I’m not entirely against this stance. I mean, why do we punish students for failing to learn, when teachers are paid to facilitate learning? My audiences don’t get punished for not laughing at the jokes I tell. I just don’t get gigs. I mean, I do, but...
I take it one step further – should parents be fined for the truancy of their kids? Hell no. Schools should be fined for creating an environment so unappealing that young people want to play hooky.
On a lighter note, here’s a success story that probably won’t make national headlines but it’s certainly not redundant because I helped make it happen. Shaun McKinney and Anna Nelson met in April 2009 through the Peer Support Network our Trust – Diversityworks – runs. Shaun is openly gay, Anna is exploring her sexuality and both share the experience of disability, though they prefer to think of it as unique function. On Friday they are traveling to Sydney Mardi Gras on the Air NZ Pink Flight, taking in the Parade and partying at the Botanical Gardens. [http://wp.me/PoylQ-R7]
I’m pretty sure they won’t be deeply sorry for the irresponsible behaviour they engage in.